This Isn't Right
by kyyari
Summary: ADOMMY story. It takes a woman to make Adam realize his feelings for Tommy. Is Tommy ready for these feelings? M for sex and language
1. Lonely

INTRO:

"Holy Shit!" Tommy said to him-self after Adam pulled away from him at the AMAs. He fumbled to find the keys on the keyboard. The song became blurry but he pushed through it.

After the performance, Tommy had snapped back to reality. Adam walked up to him, "Sorry about that." He smiled lazily at the bassist and gave a little wink.

"Don't even worry about it. That shit was fucking hilarious." Tommy was laughing with Adam now that the shock sub-sided. He hadn't expected the kiss but he didn't think too much about it afterwards.

Adam was a little different. He wasn't sure what had come over him, but once he saw Tommy on stage with his sexy hair, all cute and petite, along with the lyrics he was singing, everything just fell into place. He knew Tommy was straight though, so lingering on the idea was bad. After a while, any feelings about the moment they shared on live television passed.

Adam and Tommy spent a lot of time together with the band for rehearsals and preparation for the New Year. They often shared little kisses now and then, but neither thought of it as anything other than friendship.

CHAPTER ONE:

It wasn't until the Glamnation Tour that Tommy was becoming restless. Too many people knew who he was which left out the ability to date, and his schedule didn't help either. He was constantly being thrown all the over the country, meeting new people with every show.

After one of the shows part way through the US tour, someone caught his eye as he walked out to meet fans, sign autographs, and take pictures.

There was a barrier keeping the fans back as Tommy and a few of the other band members came out to greet people. There was a girl standing with a few of her friends. Her back was against the railing of the barrier and she was not aware when the band members had come out. Her friends had noticed but before they could say anything, Tommy was behind her, motioning to her friends to stay quite.

In Tommy's mind, he was blown away. All he could make out from the back was the girl was roughly about an inch or so shorter than him, with short, black and blue hair. She was wearing low-rise black jeans that flared a bit at the bottom and a long-sleeve black shirt. She was talking with her friends, waiting patiently for the band to come outside. He knew she didn't notice him so he stood behind her. One of her friends was about to tell her what was going on, so he quickly motioned to her to keep quiet by putting one of his index fingers to his mouth. The girl smiled and quickly looked away so as not to draw attention.

The next thing the girl knew she felt someone squeeze her side right below her ribs which made her jump. "WHAT THE FU—" She spun around quickly and saw Tommy standing there with a smile on his face, laughing silently.

"Omg…"

"Hi." Tommy said, still smiling.

"You scared the living shit out of me!" She meant for it to come out ruder than it had, but with Tommy smiling like that at her, she was amazed that it didn't come out with a stutter.

"Yeah, sorry about that, it was too easy." Tommy looked at this girl, she was different and he liked that. He had seen many girls at different concerts, but this one caught his eye and he couldn't help the thought of wanting to borrow her for the night. The idea of dating was completely out of the question. He made that decision before he left on tour, knowing it would only cause problems. "What's your name?"

"I, uh, it's Avalon." She was startled by the question, because she knew there were many fans trying to get Tommy's attention, but he was focusing on her. She wasn't sure if she should be worried or ecstatic.

"You're joking. That's your actual name?" Tommy was dumb-founded. He never met anyone with that name before and was sure she must be lying. He brushed the bit of blond that fell in front of his face behind his ear and flipped up his hood on his black sweater as he felt a chilly breeze roll by.

Avalon looked at Tommy now, pretending to be insulted by his question and crossed her arms over her chest because she felt the wind as well. "You think I would lie to you?"

"No, I just want to make sure. It's different. I like it." Tommy smiled at her again and she smiled back. This girl was becoming more and more interesting by the second, and he couldn't seem to look away. After a moment he started to look over Avalon, taking in her facial features, burning them into his memory. She had pale skin, and bright green eyes outlined in black liner. Her lips were slightly tinted with a burgundy that he couldn't tell if it was natural or some kind of gloss.

"Are you OK?" Once Avalon spoke, Tommy almost jumped. He must have zoned out for a moment while looking at her face. He knew he must have seemed creepy so he smiled again.

"Yeah, sorry. I'm easily distracted. You look cold." As he said this, Tommy started taking off his sweater to hand to the girl. Avalon stood there in shock as she saw that he was going to offer her his sweater. She took it in her hands and started to pull it on. At this point her friends had taken off, in an attempt to hunt down Adam for autographs.

Tommy had to leave shortly to go to the hotel where he and the band were staying for the night, but he knew he wanted this girl. There was something about her, and after going so long without, well, anything, he figured he might stand a chance. With this thought in mind, he leaned over the barrier to speak into Avalon's ear. "Do you want to come back to the hotel with me tonight? I have an early flight in the morning, so I can't promise anything, but we can have a couple drinks in my room."

Avalon at first was sceptical. She knew where this was leading, but decided she didn't really care. Tommy was being nice about it at least, and had been a gentleman, even if he did scare her upon first meeting. "Yeah that should be fine. Seems like my friends have taken off anyway. I'll send them a message later."

Tommy was thrilled that she said yes. He wrote which hotel and the room number on a piece of paper and told her to meet him there in about an hour as he still had to greet other fans and pack up some stuff from the show.

When Tommy finally arrived at the hotel, he found Avalon, still wearing his sweater, sitting on the floor with her back against his room door. His stomach flipped with excitement because he knew he wasn't going to be alone tonight.

"I'm glad you showed up," he said as he put his hand out to help her up from the floor.

"As if I could say no." A smile spread across her face as she took Tommy's hand and stood up. He led her into his room, while still holding her hand. He let go once inside to put some of his stuff away and Avalon sat on the couch which was in front of a fairly decent sized TV.

After Tommy was done unpacking a few of his things, he opened the mini bar fridge and looked over at the girl getting comfy on the couch. "Do you want anything to drink?"

"I'll take a beer." He grabbed a couple beers from the fridge, handed one to Avalon, and then sat down beside her. He took the remote off of the side table and turned the TV on and flipped through the channels.

"It's nice to have someone here. Normally I do this shit on my own." Tommy smiled as he looked away from the TV for a moment to see the expression on Avalon's face. He could see she was smiling, but she didn't avert her eyes from the TV. He moved himself a bit closer to her and put his arm around her shoulder. He knew the reaction he would get could be really good or really bad, but he only had the one night, so he took the chance. He was happy when he found that Avalon snuggled him under his arm and laid her head against his chest.

The next thing he knew Avalon had her hand on his thigh. The pressure from her fingers as they made little circles by his knee made his breath catch. He looked down at her and took his other hand that wasn't around her shoulders to pull her chin up so he could look at her face. Her hand moved upwards on his thigh slightly as she moved up to look Tommy in the eye.

Tommy slipped his hand behind Avalon's neck and pulled her into a deep kiss, and he felt her tongue brush his bottom lip. He opened his mouth and allowed her tongue to enter before slipping his into her mouth.

He could feel her hand on his thigh as it slowly moved upwards and closer to his growing erection and it made his pants suddenly tighter than he liked. Avalon felt him tense under her as her hands finally reached their destination. She rubbed small, gentle circles over his cock and smiled when she heard him moan into her mouth. Still kissing her, he edged her onto her back on the couch and her hand moved to his back, causing Tommy to groan from the loss of contact.

Avalon slipped away from underneath Tommy, breaking their kiss, and grabbed his hand. She gave him a quick smile. He sat on the couch slightly confused when she pulled him up and brought him over to the bed.

"Come lay with me." She lay back and pulled off her shirt, leaving her bra on. Tommy nodded and smiled, following suit by taking off his shirt and crawled onto the bed so he was right over her. He leaned down and began kissing her again. He heard her moan slightly underneath him and it made him hot. He took one of his hands and put it on the side of her face, moving it downwards to her neck as he broke the kiss to trail his lips along the path his hand was leaving on her skin.

Avalon let her head fall back as her body arched into Tommy's. He was kissing her neck and felt her wriggling with pleasure underneath him. "You're so beautiful," he said as he nipped at her neck, leaving little, red marks.

His hand slid down to her breast and rubbed it with his palm, which only brought forth another moan from Avalon's lips. Tommy felt like he was going to break if things didn't speed up. He reached around to Avalon's back and undid the clasps of her bra and pulling it off of her, throwing it to the floor beside the bed. His mouth moved down until he reached her nipple, taking it in his mouth and flicking it with his tongue. He put his other hand over in order to gently pull at her other nipple.

Avalon's breathe quickened. She was losing herself in pleasure while Tommy played with her breasts. Her hands were running up and down his back, pulling him closer to her. Tommy leaned back a bit, letting go of her, breaking their kiss, and began to work at her pants in an attempt to remove them as fast as he could. Growing impatient, Avalon took control and slipped her pants and underwear off in one quick movement. Tommy smiled at her as he did the same. Avalon looked down to see Tommy's hard cock be set free from the tight constraints of his pants.

"Whoa.." She smiled back at Tommy once she could bring her eyes back up to his face. He smirked knowingly as he lay back down beside her so he could easily roam his hand over her body. He began kissing her deeply on the mouth again, allowing their tongues to get tangled. He let his hand skim over her now erect nipples before lightly brushing over her stomach and resting it gently on her thigh. Avalon's hands were gripping the back of Tommy's hair in an attempt to reach her tongue down the back of his throat. She moaned as she felt his hand reach closer between her legs. She could feel his erection pushing against her leg, and she arched into it, causing him to moan and kiss her harder.

With the feel of her pushing against him, Tommy brought his hand up and slowly began rubbing Avalon's clit. She squirmed and moaned with the touch. Tommy started working faster with his fingers before moving down and feeling her wetness. He teased her slightly, making a circular motion with his finger before pushing inside. Avalon broke the kiss so she could breathe and let her head fall back. Tommy smiled as he inserted another finger, pushing them both up against her g-spot as he brought them in and out.

"Mmm… oh my god.. T-tommy.. mm, jesus." Avalon reached her hand down to grab Tommy's wrist and push him deeper inside of her. Her breaths were short and staggered.

Tommy loved the sight as he looked down at Avalon, with her eyes closed and a slight smile on her face as he continued to finger fuck her. It made his cock painfully hard. He made small kisses along her body, starting at her neck. He flicked his tongue on one of her nipples before moving on. He let his tongue trace a line down the middle of her stomach. He could feel Avalon tense under him, feeling him go lower. She looked down at him for a moment, urging him to move faster. He gave her a quick glance through his lashes before pulling his fingers out of her to grab a hold of her hips. Tommy let his tongue slide lower until it nudged at her clit gently. Avalon's head fell back into the pillows again, putting an arm over her eyes while the other grabbed onto anything she could hold onto—the blankets.

Tommy took one of his hands to tuck his blond hair behind his ears before replacing it onto her hip and began to flick his tongue at her clit. He felt her shift her hips at the feeling, trying to push into him. His tongue started doing small circles before moving down and pushing his tongue inside her. Sliding it in and out, pushing as deep as he could upon every re-entry.

"Ah fuck, Tommy." Avalon's back arched off the bed and Tommy pulled back, smiling as he crawled back up beside her and gave her a deep kiss so she could taste herself on his tongue. She slid her tongue over his trying to savour the taste of herself and the distinct taste of Tommy, her fingers fisting in his hair. He brought his hand back over and slid two of his fingers back inside, pushing forcefully up into her g-spot.

"Fuck, Tommy! mmFuck!" she mouthed against his lips, still trying not to break the kiss. Avalon shoved herself down onto his fingers in an attempt to make him go deeper. He slid another finger inside of her and she lost control, her head turning, breaking the kiss, trying to catch her breath. She brought one of her hands down, grabbing his cock firmly and started pumping, feeling the precome drip from the slit.

"Mmm.. fuck. Ava.. lon.. jesus fuck." Tommy couldn't hold out much longer the way she was jacking him. He pulled his fingers out from inside her and grabbed a condom from his nightstand that he placed there while unpacking. He ripped it open and rolled in on. He looked at Avalon in the eyes as he positioned himself over her. She placed her hands on his hips, motioning for him to go. "Please. Tommy, please."

Tommy caved with her begging and slowly entered Avalon. She arched into him, forcing all of him into her at once. Tommy moaned once he was inside and waited a moment before he began thrusting.

Avalon's hands snaked along his back, leaving scratch marks with her nails. She pushed into him in an attempt to feel him deeper inside of her. He started slowly moving in and out, with his arms wrapped up, holding onto her shoulders.

"Fuck, ahh, Tommy, harder.. Fuck me harder.. mm.. f-faster." He began thrusting harder, feeling her around him. He leaned back a bit on his knees, and wrapped her legs around his waist. He brought one of his hands down so he could rub her clit as he thrust into her.

"Oh my.. god.. fuck" The sounds coming from the beautiful girl underneath him brought Tommy very close. He could feel Avalon tense around his cock and he knew she was coming. "Fuck, Tommy, fuck, oh my god." With the extra pressure around his cock his thrusts sped up and became erratic. After going in and out of Avalon a few more times, reaching in as deep as he could, he felt his orgasm spread through his body. "Fuck."

Tommy's breathing was heavy as he collapsed on top of Avalon, laying there for a moment before pulling out of her and removing the condom, placing it in the garbage can beside the bed.

He lay back down on his back, slowly bringing his breathing back to normal. He felt Avalon slide her way over to him, resting her head on his chest. He wrapped an arm around her, and brought her face up to look her in the eye. She smiled at him and leant in to kiss him. He returned the kiss before laying back, still holding her in his arms and running his fingers through her hair. He was smiling as he closed his eyes and drifted to sleep.

When he woke up in the morning, he found himself alone in the bed. After taking a moment to remember the events of last night and allowing his eyes to focus, he looked around the room. He found the place had been cleaned up a bit with his sweater neatly folded on the edge of the bed and there was a note on the nightstand.

Tommy,

I can only imagine how lonely it can get with what you do. Thank you for the amazing time last night and hopefully we can see each other again someday. Good luck with everything you do.

A.

Tommy sat there, reading the note over and over again. He knew it was going to be hard to tell her to leave when he woke-up because he wasn't sure if she was going to be one of those girls who wanted more than he could offer. He was astounded to find that she took care of that for him. He muttered a "thank you" to her under his breath. He felt bad for the situation, but he was really grateful that he didn't spend the night alone.


	2. Jealous

Tommy was sitting on the plane next to Adam flying to god knows where. Too many places in too short of a time made him forget where they were and where they were going sometimes. He was sitting back with his eyes closed listening to his iPod when he swore he could hear someone calling his name. He opening his eyes and pulled out one of the earpieces to find Adam leaning forward looking at him.

"What?"

"You've got a stupid grin on your face." Adam giggled slightly and sat back, still looking at Tommy. "Are you going to tell me why?"

Tommy blushed slightly and averted his eyes from Adam, trying to hold back the smile that he didn't even know was there.

"He got laid last night. Be grateful you didn't have to hear everything through the walls," Longineu piped up from the seat behind them, laughing.

"Shit man, you heard that?" Tommy spun around in his seat with a look of shock on his face.

"Dude, the woman was practically screaming. I'd be surprised if the whole hotel didn't hear you." Longineu was laughing more now, seeing Tommy's expression change from shock to embarrassment. "Obviously you did well, congrats."

Tommy slunk back in his seat and looked at Adam. Adam seemed to be thinking about what he just heard. "Well there you have it. Happy now?" Adam looked at Tommy with a grin on his face.

"Yeah, you seem less frustrated now. You were starting to drive some of us crazy. I guess it must have been sexual frustration." Adam laughed as Tommy nudged him in the ribs with his elbow.

Tommy began listening to his music again, thinking about Avalon was hard. He knew that if he could have, he would have probably stayed with her. It was unrealistic though, seeing as she didn't even live anywhere near him, and it would have just ended disastrously. That idea made him appreciate what he did get to have with her, even if it was only one night.

Adam sat quietly beside Tommy, sneaking glances at him every now and then. He was uncertain as to why the idea of Tommy having sex with a random girl last night made him a little jealous. They were just friends, and everything has been fine. He found it comforting before though, knowing that he always got those little kisses on and off stage. He always took them in a friendship kind of way, but the idea that someone got more than that was a bit unnerving. Obviously he has to figure it out, decipher his thoughts and determine what it means so that he can learn to deal with it.

Once they landed, Adam had a couple interviews before sound check. He told the band he would meet them later, and as always, Tommy came up and gave him a little peck on the lips and said they would meet up later at the concert hall.

A flip went through Adam's stomach with that little gesture from Tommy. Now he was really confused. That hadn't happened since the AMAs. He took off to handle the interviews, deciding that moment wasn't the right time to think about it.

"Alright everyone, let's give this crowd their money's worth!" Adam said to the band as they got ready to head out on stage. He looked at Tommy briefly and saw him fiddling with his shirt before he looked up to see Adam watching him.

"Come on, we're going to wreck this place." Tommy winked at Adam and motioned for them to get on stage as he walked over to pick up his bass.

Again, his stomach fluttered. _What the fuck is going on here. It's just Tommy. Pretty, little Tommy. Fuck, I need to relax._ Adam walked over to his position to start the show.

When Tommy walked over to Adam during "Down the Rabbit Hole," Adam ran his hands down Tommy's chest, with a little more oomph than normal. He could tell that Tommy noticed because he turned back to face Adam after and he was slightly blushing and a grin on his face.

Fever was always a spectacular event for the fans, but this time Adam was a little unsure how he was going to react when Tommy was so close to him. The song started and Adam began "There he goes, my baby walks so slow. Sexual tic-tac-toe. Yeah I know we both know, it isn't time. No.. But could you be m-mine." At this point Adam was to kiss Tommy, but instead he stood there looking at him, almost in a daze. Tommy noticed and leaned forward. Adam gave him a little kiss on the lips and watched as Tommy smirked at him and walked back so Adam could go meet up with the dancers.

_What just happened there? Did he almost forget to kiss me? We always kiss. Why is he so distracted tonight?_ Tommy was confused as he continued to play his bass.

After the show, everyone got ready to head over to the hotel. They were staying there for two nights so they had the luxury of putting off getting on a bus until they leave.

Everyone slid into the limo, waiting for Adam to arrive so they could leave. Tommy sat, talking with the others, but still had thoughts of Adam and his behaviour earlier on his mind. Once Adam arrived, he barely looked at Tommy, which was odd, because they would normally talk about the performance and people's reactions to the show. Now he knew there was definitely something going on. He just had to wait until they arrived at the hotel so he could bring it up.

_Why can't I even look at him right now? I want to talk to him about the show like we always do, but my stomach is doing backflips. I need to get a hold of myself. He is probably already suspecting something._

Adam went into the hotel first to check in and organize the rooms while everyone else grabbed their luggage. Once everyone was gathered in the lobby, Adam handed out room keys.

Tommy made sure to take note of what room Adam was in, so he could stop by after. Everyone headed to their rooms. Most people were sharing rooms, but because of the way things worked out, Tommy and Adam always had their own rooms.

Once Tommy was unpacked and everything, he changed into more comfortable clothes and decided to head over to see Adam before he fell asleep.

Adam was sitting in his room, trying to figure out his thoughts. He just found out about Tommy sleeping with that girl this morning; how could it change things so drastically in just a few hours? He got up to start putting his clothes in the drawer and organize to make his room a little more, well, Adam-y. It made travelling easier. As he was putting up some pictures on his nightstand, he heard a knock on the door. _Oh shit._

"Adam, it's Tommy. You awake?"

_Fuck, he did notice. Well, here goes nothing._ Adam went and opening the door to find Tommy in a pair of sweats and a Metallica shirt. His face was already clean from the make-up he had on earlier and his hair had been brushed out.

"Hey. You OK? What's up?" Adam asked as he let Tommy into his room.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm more curious about you. You were acting weird today on stage and then later in the limo. Is there something bothering you?" Tommy looked a little concerned as he made himself comfortable sitting on the edge of Adam's bed.

"I was? I didn't mean to. I've just had a few things on my mind."

"Like what?" Tommy looked at Adam when he said that with an eyebrow raised. He was genuinely curious and a little concerned.

"You know I'm a very honest and up-front person. I'm not going to lie to you, but I don't think it's something I want to talk about, right now." Adam took a seat beside Tommy on the bed. His stomach was feeling a little nauseous because of the conversation.

"Adam, you know you can talk to me. I know it has to do with me, because you wouldn't even look at me today in the limo. Plus, you were acting different during the show."

Adam gave a sigh and looked at Tommy. _Little fucker is a bit over observant. Maybe if I just tell him, it would be easier to figure it out._ Adam continued to look at Tommy, trying to find the words to express what he needed to say.

"Adam, seriously. You can tell me anything."

"It's really fucked up. I don't even know how it happened. After finding out about your little escapade last night, I felt a little jealous. I don't understand it and now I'm just trying to figure out what it means. I'm not trying to push you away or act differently. I guess I've just got to work it out."

Tommy sat there, looking at Adam with a slight look of shock. That was one of the last things he expected to come up when he planned to confront Adam. He took a moment before speaking, unsure of how to respond. Questions were flying through his head, but he wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer.

"Thank you for telling me the truth. I appreciate that. We can talk about it if you want?" Tommy was kind of clearing his mind a bit. It was huge that Adam even admitted something like that to him. But he knew Adam would tell him the truth before he would tell him a lie. He's just that kind of person.

"I don't know what there is to talk about. It just kind of all happened at once. I'm not even sure if jealousy is the right word. I don't know how to describe it. It's something I haven't felt towards you since the AMAs. We've always been great friends since I hired you, and I never had the intention of changing that." Adam was having a bit of trouble coming out this way to Tommy. Tommy was always supportive and open-minded when it came to Adam's sexuality, but he wasn't sure how far that would go if he knew Adam's feelings were changing. Even if those changes weren't something even Adam was ready to face.

Tommy had to take a minute to repeat what he had just heard in his head. More questions just kept appearing. He figured talking about it is better than ignoring it though.

"OK. Um. Wow. Alright, so we obviously need to talk about this. I'm going to start by asking, what did you feel towards me at the AMAs?" Tommy looked at Adam intently. He needed to answer some of these questions in order to get any sense of what Adam was talking about.

Adam fell back on the bed so he was lying down with his feet still on the floor. He looked up at the ceiling and sighed. _Shit, I had to mention the fucking AMAs._ "I just had thoughts about what it would be like if you weren't straight. I still wouldn't have the intention of changing anything, and it was a very short period of time that these thoughts even crossed through my mind."

"What exactly do you mean by 'if you weren't straight'?"

"Just that. To be perfectly honest, Tommy, you're my type in pretty much every way except for the straight part. If you weren't straight, I would have tried to convince you to go out with me or something silly like that. Of course, it had to cross my mind at some point, right?"

"I am? I never pegged myself as someone's type before." Tommy laughed a little at that idea. He knew Adam and that this was probably hard for him to discuss, but that's what he likes about him: he'll talk about it, even if it's something he doesn't particularly want to talk about. Back to the questions however, as there were quite a few. "So what's different now?"

Adam knew this was going to come up. He sat up again and looked at Tommy in the eye. He was his type, pretty much perfectly. From his overall style to just how damn pretty he is. Adam likes his boys to be pretty. "To be honest, I don't know. You, ugh.. I can't believe I'm going to tell you this.. You, well, you give me butterflies."

Tommy smiled. _How fucking adorable is that. I give this man fucking butterflies._ "Seriously?" Tommy looked at Adam and moved closer to him. "Do you have them now?" _Why the fuck am I doing this? I slept with Avalon last night, and now I'm testing my ability on giving a man butterflies. There is seriously something wrong with me._

Adam did feel his stomach drop when Tommy moved closer to him, but he chose not to voice that. He was sure Tommy could tell anyways, especially by the smug grin he had on his face after he moved and saw Adam's reaction.

"You do, I can tell." Tommy backed off a little. He was confused as to why he wanted to test that theory in the first place. And he was even more confused as to why he had the urge to kiss Adam. They had done it multiple times before, but it was just out of fun. He knew that if he kissed Adam right now, it would be different, and that scared him.

Adam could tell Tommy was thinking about something. He let him sit there with his thoughts before he spoke. "What are you thinking about?" He eyed Tommy warily, as if trying to read his mind.

Tommy hesitated before he answered, playing with the string on his pants before meeting Adams eyes. "I don't know. I've never been in this situation before. If you could have anything you want from this situation right now, what would it be? Honestly. Put aside the fact that I'm straight. If I wasn't, what would you do right now?" He wasn't sure if he wanted to know the answer, and from Adam's reaction to the question, he was almost regretting asking it at all.

"Uh, well.. Hmm.. I don't know. Those are two different questions. I guess the first answer would be, I would want to be closer to you. I would never put pressure on anything and nothing serious, considering we work together. As for right now, I would probably try to kiss you." Adam wasn't looking at Tommy anymore as he spoke the last few words. But Tommy was watching him.

_Did he just say he wants to kiss me? He would kiss me, but he won't because I'm straight. This is so fucked up. Why do I want him to? Fuck it, just do it. Nnnnnnow._ Tommy lent over and put his hand on Adam's face. Pulling him close, Tommy placed his lips on Adam's. Adam sat there as he let Tommy kiss him. He was confused, but set that aside as he began to kiss him back.

Tommy licked at Adam's bottom lip, and Adam opened his mouth. Tommy slipped his tongue inside and felt Adam push back. The kiss became more passionate as Adam put his hand on the back of Tommy's neck, pulling him closer. After a moment, Adam let Tommy go and looked at him.

Tommy could see Adam studying his face. He looked confused, but he didn't say anything.

"I-I'm sorry, I just, well, I don't know. I wanted to do it." Tommy spluttered the words out. His mind was fuzzy and he wasn't even sure if he was making any sense.

"That's OK. Um, is there anything else we should talk about? Any more questions? I think we need sleep before this night gets any weirder." Adam stood up and walked over to his dresser. He was still covered in make-up so he decided he was going to take a shower; therefore, he needed a change of clothes.

Tommy felt like glue. He couldn't move for a moment, but once Adam was rummaging in his dresser for a change of clothes he knew he had to go. "Alright yeah, we're good for now I think. I'm going to let myself out. Thanks for, uh, telling me everything." _Yep, definitely something wrong with me._


	3. Butterflies

_Hello, so here is Chapter Three. I know it's been a while since I first posted, but I was away for the holidays and such, so here it is! Enjoy! I'll post the next one soon._

_Just want to make sure it is known that I own nobody! _

CHAPTER THREE: BUTTERFLIES

The following concerts were hard to get through. Adam and Tommy kept up with their fanservice on stage, but the little kisses off stage slowed down dramatically. After they had shared that kiss—which was different, just as Tommy knew it would have been—they weren't really able to get back into the friendly kisses. Even the kisses on stage we hard to act out, there was still a bit more passion in them than before, and neither Tommy nor Adam was able to put normality back into them.

Whenever Adam touched Tommy on stage, Tommy liked it. More than he did before. It was confusing him and scary at the same time. He knew Adam harboured some feelings for him, even if they aren't love or anything like that; he still knew they were more than friendly feelings. He wasn't sure what he wanted to do about it.

At one of the concerts, the band was playing fever and Tommy was standing behind Adam. He felt the urge to put his arm around Adam's waist so it sat on his hip and held him close. He liked being close to Adam and he knew the only time he would get to would be on stage. What was different about this time though, was that Adam put his hand over Tommy's, and Tommy opened his hand, so they were holding hands on stage, even for a brief moment. For the first time since this all started, Tommy had butterflies in his stomach.

The concert ended and Tommy was last to leave the stage, as usual. His mind was running a million miles an hour, unable to focus on anything but the tingle in his right hand that had been consistent even after Adam let him go. He felt a little shakey as he headed to his dressing room. He just wanted to get changed and cleaned up to head back to the bus. Another fucking bus night and he wasn't sure how he was going to be able to handle the small space after tonight's performance.

The rest of the band was already in the dressing room. Adam had his own room so that was fine. He cleaned up and packed his stuff. As he walked out the doors towards the bus he paused to greet a few fans. He didn't stay long once he saw Adam head out the door. He headed to the bus, unlocked the door and grabbed a beer out of the fridge before sitting himself on the couch. He only had a few moments to himself before the rest of the band piled on.

Everyone was chatting excitedly as they took their seats scattered around the bus. Monte and Longineu sat at the table pulling out a pack of cards and Cam sat down next to Tommy, who had a dazed look on his face as he stared out the window at nothing in particular.

"Hey, you ok?" Cam's voice rang through Tommy's head, forcing his to look over at her. He didn't really catch what she said.

"Um, sorry? What?" Tommy looked at Cam and saw the concern in her eyes. Monte and Longineu were too busy talking about who's the bigger cheater to even notice the conversation.

"Oh honey, what's on your mind. You've been distant tonight. Did something happen?" Cam positioned herself so she could see tommy better and still be comfortable. She looked him over as he reacted to her question.

He sighed deeply and put his head in his hands. He didn't think telling Cam about the whole Adam thing was going to help. "I'm alright. I just have a lot on my mind."

Cam wasn't entirely pleased with the answer but there wasn't time to retort when Adam made his way onto the bus. He scanned the room saying hello to everyone before heading to the back of the bus. "Tommy, can you come with me please?"

Tommy looked up at Adam as he moved past him towards the back of the bus. Tommy shot a small smile at Cam as he got up and followed Adam.

When Tommy walked into Adam's quarter's, Adam closed the door and sat on his bed. Now that Tommy was in his room he wasn't sure how to discuss what happened on stage earlier. He stayed silent and looked down as he slowly removed his boots.

"You held my hand." Tommy spoke in almost a whisper that Adam was almost unsure he heard him at all. But he could make out the statement. He took a moment before responding. After he removed his boots he patted the space beside him, motioning for Tommy to take a seat.

"I think that was more of a team effort." Adam looked straight ahead as he spoke, but turned to look at Tommy when he didn't hear him say anything.

"Look, I know things have been a bit off since we spoke in the hotel that night, but I don't want things to be this way. I'm trying my best with whatever it is I feel. It seems to be more persistent than last time, but I'm still trying. The thing on stage today may have thrown me a bit off, but I really want to be able to have things the way they were before. I'm sorry." Adam looked at Tommy now as he spoke, but Tommy wouldn't meet his eyes. They were down, looking at his hands on his lap. The silence hung for a moment that Adam almost jumped when Tommy spoke.

"Adam, I know you've been trying. I've had to put effort in too, believe it or not. Ever since you confessed your feelings in the hotel, my mind has had a hard time focusing. It's confusing the shit out of me." Tommy took a breath then finally looked up into Adam's eyes. He was surprised to find the singer had a small smirk on his face. But it was wiped away once he realized Tommy noticed.

"What exactly are you saying, Tommy?" Adam felt his stomach jolted at the idea of Tommy returning any of his feelings. Not that he was sure what to do if it did happen. It would probably just cause more problems than fix any.

"I don't know what I'm saying. All I know is that ever since we spoke I find myself thinking about how you feel, and how it makes me feel." Tommy was fidgeting with his hands on his lap, but kept his gaze locked with Adam's.

"And how does that make you feel?" Adam felt an itch in his hands from the need to touch Tommy. He put his hands under his legs to keep them still.

"Confused as fuck." Tommy averted his eyes. He hadn't really been able to figure out his feelings, or admit to himself that he actually had any that were more than friendly towards the glittery rocker. "I don't know what I should do. It's fucking with my mind, and I don't want to hurt you. I can't make any promises that I can return your feelings. I want to find out if I could, but it would just make things worse, I think."

Adam sat silently, watching Tommy, unsure of how to proceed. When Tommy met Adam's eyes again, Adam took one of his hands from under the safety of his leg and placed it on one of Tommy's hands, which were still fidgeting in his lap. The fidgeting stopped though once Tommy felt Adam's hand on his. The blond let out a sigh and let his fingers get laced with Adam's.

"I appreciate your concern Tommy, and I'm glad you told me. You know, however, that I can't be an experiment for you though, because you're right, someone will just get hurt. That someone would probably be me, and I have too much in this to let that happen." Adam's eyes locked on Tommy's with an apologetic look on his face. He rubbed his thumb on the back of Tommy's hand as he watched him. He liked the feel of Tommy's slender fingers intertwined with his larger ones; the rough callouses tickling his skin.

Tommy squeezed Adam's hand before he spoke, trying to find some comfort in it. "I know. It's so frustrating because I like you, but I have no way of figuring out what kind of 'like' that is. I have thought about it a lot since we spoke and it still seems fuzzy. Things seem clearer when we're on stage and we're close. Today was different though, we held hands, much like we are now." Tommy took the cue to look down at their hands on his lap, Adam's thumb still rubbing circles, making Tommy feel more comfortable and confident. "You told me before that I gave you butterflies. Well I got butterflies today when we held hands. That was the first time I actually had them from you. I haven't had time to really think about it, but I think that means _something_, don't you?" Tommy brought his eyes back up to meet Adam's, the electric blue shooting through him as his stomach tied knots sailors would be impressed with.

"That's something you're going to have to figure out on your own Tommy. But I'm not going to sit and wait to find out, especially since I might be waiting for nothing. I'll give you one thing tonight and whether it helps or not, it's all I'm giving you." Adam let go of Tommy's hand to move it to the back of Tommy's neck. He pulled him close and pressed his lips gently against Tommy's for a brief moment before pulling away. He stood up and walked out of the room to go sit with the others while Tommy sat, stunned from what just happened. _I need to get this shit figured out soon. What the fuck am I going to do?_

Tommy got up and walked out of Adam's room. He said a brief goodnight to everyone and got into his bunk. He decided to get a good sleep and use the day off tomorrow to figure out everything. He didn't have time to take his time with this, so he let himself relax for the night so he could take on the stress of his feelings tomorrow.


	4. Decisions

**OK everyone. I have pulled out another chapter. I have a general idea where this is heading. It has averted a bit from when I first started, so I'm sorry about the misleading title! But it will come! Trust me! :) (Ps. I own nobody!)**

CHAPTER FOUR: DECISIONS

Tommy woke up the next morning with the swift movement of the bus rocking around him. He rubbed a hand over his eyes as he thought over the shitfuck mess he created and the decision he had to make. He groaned as he slid off of his bunk. It was still dark outside and everyone was still sleeping, but he couldn't get back to sleep now even if he tried.

He went into the small living area of the bus, making sure his movements were quiet. No need to wake up the rest of the band. The light on the coffee maker gleamed a red haze in the dark as he turned it on and lay back on the miniscule couch. Pulling a soft red cushion up to fit comfortable behind his head, Tommy began to think. He didn't have time to waste so it was important to organize his thoughts.

_This is all so sudden.  
I don't know what the fuck I'd be getting myself into here.  
I got fucking butterflies!  
What does that mean?  
Do I want to start shit with Adam?  
My father is gone. I don't know if my family could handle something like this right now.  
But I like the way it feels.  
Should I like this?  
It's not me. Not who I am._

Tommy was startled by the quiet beep from the coffee maker, alerting him his caffeine was ready. It pulled him quickly out of his thoughts as he rushed over to make sure the beeping stopped. He made his coffee and turned off the handy little appliance before re-positioning himself on the couch. Regardless of how tiny he was, he still didn't have enough room on the small couch to spread out, so his knees bent as he sat back against the armrest. He shoved the pillow around behind him to keep the armrest from jabbing him uncomfortably in the back and let his mind shift back into his previous thoughts.

_What if I just say 'fuck it?'  
I could do that.  
But what if this is just an experiment?  
I can't hurt Adam.  
If this clusterfuck of a relationship, if we could even call it that, yeah, that's what it would be, fuck; if it happened, and the shit hit the fan, I could very well be screwed out of a job. No pun intended. Oh, jesus fuck, already thinking about the sex.  
But that would happen, right?  
Of course it would happen._

Tommy's back started to ache slightly so he shifted to get more comfortable. He took a sip of his coffee, which burnt his tongue a little, but set it down and closed his eyes. He needed to stay focused.

_He kissed me.  
We held hands.  
I liked it.  
I fucking liked it.  
What if I don't do this?  
We could just be friends; make no change to how we are, how we were.  
That would be fine right?  
Fuck.  
But I want him to want me, hold me, and kiss me.  
That's so fucking weird.  
I wonder if we're close to wherever we're going..  
What the fuck time is it?  
Oh sweet mother of fuck its 4am.  
Where the fuck is my coffee?  
Ok. Ok. Back on track.  
I should just do it.  
I want to.  
Do I need to ask myself so many questions as to why I shouldn't?  
I have more answers as to why I should.  
I guess I'm going to do this.  
I'll have to be honest with him, and me. I know nothing about what I'm getting myself into.  
I've got a lot to learn.  
He better be fucking ready to show me._

Tommy finally came to his decision. It wasn't as hard as he thought it would be, but it still scared the shit out of him. He drank the rest of his coffee which made him feel jittery and restless. He didn't have much sleep to go on and couldn't wait to get to the hotel so he could sleep in a real bed.

It was then that he had an idea. _Adam has a bed, pretty fucking big too._

Tommy made his way to the back of the bus, putting his coffee mug in the teeny sink on his way. He continued his ninja-technique of staying quiet as he shuffled past the bunks where the rest of the band slept and silently opened the paper-thin door to Adam's rock star room.

It was dark in the room, but he could still make out the slight outline of Adam sprawled across the bed. A thin red duvet covered half of his large frame, and light flannel pyjama pants slid halfway up one of his legs. Tommy stood there watching Adam sleep for a brief moment, hesitating whether he was making the right decision. He quickly pushed the thought away, knowing he shouldn't hesitate and if he really wasn't fucking sure, he should leave now, but he didn't want to.

He shut the door behind him as quietly as he could and made his way over to the bed, contemplating the best way to slide in without waking Adam up. Seeing as the fucker was taking up pretty much the whole bed, Tommy knew he was going to have to be pretty creative. He was small, and learned how to fit into even smaller spaces. It was times like these that made him happy he had that little, unknown talent.

He lifted one side of the light blanket and slid in, slightly pushing up against Adam so he could feel Adam's side against his back. A small mumble escaped Adam's lips as he shifted and wrapped his arms around Tommy. Tommy lay still for a moment, before realising Adam was actually still asleep and had re-positioned himself self-consciously.

Tommy allowed himself to get comfortable and relax as he laced his fingers with Adam's, holding his arm tightly around his waist. It was soothing and he felt fucking weird. It was something he would have to get over though. He made up his mind, and there was no way in fucking hell he could even change it now.

…

_..The fuck?_ Adam woke abruptly, feeling his arms wrapped around a petit frame that was hot against his chest. He moved to sit up and focus his eyes. It was dark in the room, but he could make out the blond hair sprawled all over his pillow in a heaping mess.

"Tommy?" Adam was a bit shocked to find his bassist curled into a ball on his bed. It was still dark out and the bus was rumbling, which meant they were still moving towards their destination.

The only noise from Tommy however was a hushed snore before he shifted, sprawling his legs out and lying on his stomach. Obviously the man could tell there was more available space even in his sleep.

Adam looked over him for a moment, noticing Tommy in a baggy black t-shirt and thin, grey cotton pants. Figuring the blond might have gotten lost after a bathroom break; Adam began to shove at Tommy a little in an attempt to wake him, repeating his name.

"Hmm. What?" Tommy started to stir a little, but not enough to really wake him. It wasn't until Adam pinched his side that he jolted upright, letting out a straggled yelp.

"Shh! Fuck! The rest of the band is probably still sleeping! What the fuck are you doing?" Adam used a harsh whisper as he spoke to Tommy.

The little bassist started remembering where he was and why he was there. He looked at Adam apologetically before speaking.

"I – uh, well, hmm." He wasn't sure how to start explaining his whole escapade from earlier and the decision he made.

"Did you get lost or something?" Adam looked at Tommy confused, one of his eyebrows quirked up as he waited for a response.

"No, I didn't get lost. I got up earlier and spent a bit of time thinking, you know, about what we talked about last night." Tommy averted his eyes from Adam and let one of his hands travel to the back of his head to scratch at the top of his neck. He yawned and his hand moved to stifle it. When Tommy looked back at Adam, he could still make out the blue in his eyes in the dark.

It was silent for a moment as Adam examined Tommy. The silence was broken once Tommy decided to continue with his explanation.

"I made a decision. If you really want me, that is. If you do then I want to try this out. I'm going to need a shit load of help. I hope you understand that. I don't want to hurt you and this is no fucking experiment. I am going to try my best. If you'll have me." Tommy held his gaze on Adam as he watched the singer's reaction.

Shock set in first before confusion, then pensiveness. Adam took a moment to make sure he was taking in everything Tommy said correctly. "You're sure about this? You want to start seeing each other?" Tommy nodded, making sure he sent the message with his gaze, never taking his eyes off Adam's.

"I'm sure. I wouldn't be here and saying anything if I wasn't. It was made perfectly clear this is something we can't fuck around with. We have a lot at stake here." Tommy let his hand slide its way over the one of Adam's where he laced their fingers and let a small smile form on his lips.

"Yes we do. We also need sleep. I'm sure we'll be arriving at the hotel soon. We can talk more there ok? For now you can stay here if you want, but we still have to talk more about this." Adam gave Tommy a warning look. He was serious, but also very fucking tired. He lay down and allowed Tommy to curl up on his chest.

"Ok, more talking later. Thank you." Tommy lifted his head to look up at Adam. Moving himself up a bit, he successfully placed a small, chaste kiss against the singer's cheek before settling back down and closing his eyes.

They both drifted to sleep to the sound of the hum of the bus's engine.


End file.
